Monday, October 4, 2010
So I have been extremely stressed/upset/sad/angry...anything but happy lately. I have been just a mess lately. My life has been turned upside down and back again since last Saturday, and I have really been confused. So for the first time I realized I had no control (that kills me). I realize I can only do so much until I have made the situation worse than it was. So i got down on my knees and prayed. The problem with that was, the way I wanted my prayer to be answered wasn't. It was the total opposite, and to this day I am sitting here wondering why in the world he chose this living situation for me. I know my answer will come, and he will use me for his glory, but right now i'm so....blah. I can't explain to you the nights I've cried myself to sleep or just the occasional song that brings me to tears.
So moral of that story. It's when we hit rock bottom, when you think things can't get worse, and you are just in a spot of dismay, turn to Jesus. Although I have no earthly idea why my prayer was answered the other way, and am not too happy with it, I know I serve a mighty God, who is bigger than this problem, and will be my strength.
The one verse that I have found extremely helpful during this time is "Don't worry about anything, instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done." -Philippians 4:6